Depression: Then and Now


I was going to do a live video about this, but thought that maybe a post would be more appropriate.  Perhaps at some point, there will be a live video as well.

Looking back over the past few months, I think it would be fair to say I have been struggling with depression.  This is due to a few things.  The loss of my father in the fall is part of it.  Yes, it happened in the fall, however, my tendency to deal with hurtful/uncomfortable things is to keep busy.  I think that is what I did to avoid the feelings associated with my father’s death.  That combined with his birthday being on February 10, followed by the horrific murder of two teenage girls in my hometown of Delphi, IN were just enough to make things really dark and hard for me.  On top of that, the cold, dark weather and my husband traveling were just the icing on the cake.   {If you click on the link above, you will understand more of the depth of the pain of what occurred in my hometown.  February was a very rough month for me.  This carried into March, until spring break.

See, I have lived with depression before.  Once I had our first born child, I was diagnosed with post partum.  After our second child was born, I was diagnosed with PTSD.  So yes, I am familiar with mental illness.  God has done a mighty work in my life with my mind.  The combination of Jesus, nutrition {clean eating, as well as cutting out gluten, dairy and soy and giving my body what it needs daily}, as well as fitness has been the winning combination for me.  And, it showed this time.  See, this combo of Jesus, nutrition and fitness are newer for me.  Jesus has been part of the combo for the past 2o’ish years, however the nutrition and fitness component has only been in my life for about 3 years.

In February, when things were dark for me, I continued to do what I know.  Jesus ~ that looks like abiding time with Him in the morning in the Word and prayer.  Nutrition ~ again, clean eating, no gluten/dairy/soy/daily nutrition and 30+ minutes of exercise daily {usually cardio or pilates type exercise}.  Did things change overnight?  No, but I could tell things weren’t as dark as they had been in the past.  Part of that, I believe, is that I had the tools needed to help me in my slump, whereas before, nutrition and fitness weren’t on my radar at all.  Thankfully, God has shown me the connection between gut health and the brain {I have plenty of resources on this if you’d benefit from them, please let me know.   By continuing to do what was known and familiar I believe kept me going.  Did they give me purpose?  No, only Christ can do that.  But they were tools that have changed my life and health for the better.

That is why this site is so important to me.  The more research I do and the more I learn about our nutrition/food supply and the more clearly God reveals how this affects our stewardship, the more concerned I am for the body of Christ.  My opinion is the enemy has sneaked in here and is having a hay day with us and our health.  We are too busy to take care of ourselves, which is a discipline/heart issue.  As a result, we aren’t being good stewards or taking good care of the bodies He gave us.  The other layer He has shown me is our lack of stewardship of His earth.  How the animals we consume are treated and what they are given to eat is stewardship.  {There might be another post about this coming!!!}

All that to say, the bout of depression I had a few months ago is much different than the depression I had several years ago when our children were born.  Again, I attribute that to the combination of Jesus, nutrition and fitness.  If I can help you in any of these areas, please let me know.  As Revelation 12:11 says “we overcome by the blood of the lamb and the word of our testimony.”  My prayer is that my testimony will help you overcome as well.

Be blessed as we serve a LIVING King, friends~
~ Melissa


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